[I] wrote about this week’s round too early and said something really absurd — that next week I was thinking of increasing from 10 to 12 doses. Not going to happen.
In the future, I’ll try to hold off writing about a round until the very last hour is up. Yesterday, near the end of my round, may be between 4 and 7 PM, I was so nervously exhausted, I wanted to cry. I wanted someone to take care of me, hold me, do simple things for me. Help me get through it.
I latched on to some small grievance. Something that had a grain of truth in it, but it launched me into a gripping depression that lasted for an hour or so. Seems funny looking back, that it was so short lived, but in the moment, not at all.
That’s the roller coaster. During the round, I experienced a little bit of acceleration, a little bit of joy at the thought that I’m healing, a few glimpses of extraordinary beauty looking at the Rockies blanketed with fresh snow. But overall, it’s a blur, as if I were gripped by some large power and shaken up and dragged around. A surfer would call it getting “Maytagged” and it’s a good metaphor.
You’re riding a wave which is wonderful at first but then you get tumbled, rolled and dragged violently underwater, you can’t breathe for a while and you wonder which way is up. You might get banged on your board or on the ocean floor, before you float to the top.
So Tara, is it a train ride, a roller coaster, a stormy sea, your washing machine’s spin cycle? I guess each round will be different.
I’m hoping with the right tweaks it can become more like riding a train and less like falling in strong surf. Maybe increasing my antioxidants will do the trick and maybe increasing my cortisol supplementation… and maybe changing nothing at all but just continuing along the same path.
I think Viking Expat is the calm in our storm 😉 Chelation continues to be the smooth sail for me, with three hour dosing, 4 day rounds, 112.5 mg ALA… I’m content with not making any dramatic changes there, but other things continue to knock the wind into my sail along the way… I’ve been taking one drop of Iosol all week (1830 mcg of iodine), and have had significant nausea and weakness, and last night I was up all night vomiting. I’m going to have to take a break from it, and cut way back when the Lugol’s arrives. I’ve been making decent progress chelating, my MCS is still a nightmare, but now I think I’m realizing I’m more sick and toxic beyond the mercury… Maybe fluoride? Not quite sure, but I’m gonna have to slow down my iodine ride, quite a bit…
I’m sorry to hear about the iodine reaction Tara, sounds like you had a horrible night!
no worries, thanks for considering it, glad you are taking notes! I appreciate your kind comments and assistance as they are:)
Already 10 doses a day sounds like borderline what I could handle. I have only done 3 hour, i.e. 8 dose a day and this is also hard.
Do you have a compelling reason not to follow the standard recommendation? My understanding is that Cutler seems to view it as unnecessary torture unless you have very specific metabolic properties. Many people, including myself, can after some rounds “feel” when the chelator consentration falls. In my case it is like mild headache and a sense of vague unease and it happens almost like clockwork after 3 hours.
A very good question indeed! I think I was just persuaded by the many forum comments about higher frequency dosing feeling better. I also think I feel the chelator concentration dropping as you say on three hour intervals and don’t like that. maybe I should try three-hour intervals on a larger dose. maybe more DMSA first while holding ALA constant because I’m pretty sure it’s the ALA that gives me trouble. so many options to choose from…
the other reason for pushing things is that I want to heal faster to better cope with the demands of my life. I’m not quite up to the job as things are.
“the other reason for pushing things is that I want to heal faster to better cope with the demands of my life”
Belive me, I fully understand that aspect! But to some extent, I think that this whole way of thinking has been puched on to us by modern medicine, i.e. take a pill and get better quick. My view is that most of that is based not on healing but on supressing symptoms and often it makes things much worse over time.
Now, chelation is true healing, i.e. we are removing toxins that are hurting us and when we do this we create the conditions for the body (and brain!) to rebuild. But this takes massive amounts of energy and a fair amount of time. During the 1.5 years that I have been doing this, I have often had period of what I call “knock out tierdness”. It is like when you have been hiking all day and actually feels quite good. But if you get it on and off during the day, you are not going to do much other than sleep, which is propably what your body is telling you that you need. So, in my experience, there was no direct productivity gains in the first 6-12 months.
But having said that, I am now starting to get whole days when I work in a cool and focused way. I used to be able to this way back and it is truly great to get it back. Even if it is just a day, I will do more productive work on that day than I did in a week before chelation. And I do it much better.